Hater Tuesday: Jump the Shark Vice Week featuring Tweets from Jail, Nellie’s Liver, and Oakland’s Bronze Medal.

11.24.2009 | 9:16 am | Hater Tuesdays, The Warriors, Town Business

Twitter probably Jumped the Shark when Ashton Kutcher challenged a global news network to a popularity contest and won (Lou Dobbs was never the same after that). However, Tweeting from jail has to be recognized as some kind of milestone, right? I guess people are updating their Facebook status to “locked up,” but I always imagined that there are some things you don’t want to broadcast to the world. However, with Twitter, people just can’t wait to tell you exactly WTF they’re doing - even if it’s avoiding the prison soy meat because it has saltpeter in it. Seriously. Gawker has the snark including this gem about Ed Meese now worried about the prison population. Really, Ed Meese?

Speaking of having no shame in your game, Don Nelson did an interview with KNBR from an Indianapolis Bar a few weeks back. See, like Ashton Kutcher and Twitter, Don Nelson’s liver is taking on the world. If Manny Pacquiao fought Nellie’s Liver at the Oracle, that might get me to go there, but right now, a Warrior’s game ain’t going to do it. I don’t care how many D-League All Stars they call up. (Shout out to our very own FTB-contributor Nellie’s Liver. Not to be confused with the real Nellie’s Liver)

And finally, Oakland criminals may have jumped the shark this week now that The Town is the third highest crime city in the US. We beat out Detroit for the bronze - a significant accomplishment given that there’s nothing to do in Detroit but commit crime. How did we do that? Anyway, now that the Oakland criminals pulled their own Ashton Kutcher, it looks like the new Police Chief really is not playing. As the story goes, he was offered the Oakland Job a year ago when he was in Long Beach and turned it down, but then, while at the funeral for the slain Oakland Police back in March, he decided to take the job because “he wanted to help.” That’s some  John Wayne-type ish right there. I have a feeling there’s going to be a lot more Tweeples in jail with this guy around (sorry Ed Meese). Hopefully, he won’t take any cues from the BART Police though. This time, a BART officer in West Oakland put some raving, racist drunk guy’s head through a window, and, of course, someone Tweeted about it, and it was caught on video… and it was posted to YouTube. So, congratulations Oakland for the stellar work on the ol’ public image! Right now, in some bar in Dallas, I’m sure Don Nelson is toasting your success.

M. Meschery